I am at the pool and have been holding my breath for 2 hours. No, I am not under water. I have three young kids. AT THE POOL. Enough said. I glance around at the mothers of older children, relaxing, sun-bathing, reading a good book. My first thought is…LUCKY. My next is… when is the last time I read a book? My third is- I AM NOT READY FOR THAT!
As luxurious as it sounds, lounging on a chair is not what I signed up for in this season of life. My kids are already growing too fast. Since when can Jake jump off the side and paddle across without floaties to me? Why aren’t the babies strapped into their newborn car seats under an umbrella? Where is that pregnant belly that turned my tankini into a bikini? Time truly does fly. Sigh… Alas, this my present reality.
I am in the hold-your-breath, “get down”, “be careful”, toddler chasing, boo-boo fixing, story book reading, ever-exploring, constant praying, busy playing, booger wiping, hand washing, diaper changing, snot sucking, baby-proofing, endless question answering, “stop fighting”, being hung on, being climbed on, imaginary playing, obsession indulging, constant clothes washing, pants peeing, always juggling, not sleeping, being clung to, sucked-clawed-spitup on, clothes folding, sock searching, play group going, accident dodging, spill wiping, mess cleaning, vomit catching, germ fighting, sweet cuddling, always helping, hand holding, leg hiding, tower building, constructing, kite-flying, dirt digging, worm finding, bug collecting, potty talking, always learning, ever-growing, toppling, risk taking, butt wiping, sand eating, “please share”, tantruming, rigid carseat maneuvering, food cutting, fruit pureeing, swing pushing, constant vigilence, tickle torture, snuggling, bed wetting, nightmare reassuring, belly hurting, food throwing, toy fixing, belly laughing, full-of-wonder, ABC singing, cartoon watching, hold my breath season. And embracing every single second of it before it goes away.
I am exhausted but when the lounging in the chair time comes, I will wish for these days again. Maybe not when there is a pina colada in my hand and I am in the middle of a really good book, but I will. I know I will. Because when I look at newborns I already do.
Embrace each season as it comes. No matter where you are in life, it is where you are meant to be.